Best Dating Sites for Introverts

Best Dating Sites for Introverts

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You know what they say – to find a boyfriend or girlfriend, you have to go out and mingle! You have to be an extrovert and start going to clubs, bars, and hang-out spots.

Not a chance, right? That sounds like an introvert’s nightmare! 

But you don’t have to put your extrovert mask on just to find a date. One of the most practical ways to find love if you’re shy is by joining a dating site.

In this guide, we’re going to review the 13 best dating sites for introverts, starting with the best overall “Match” experience.


Biggest Dating Site For Introverts

What puts on top of our list of the best introverts dating site is the size of its dating pool and its compatibility quiz., founded in 1995, counts 21.5 million members. Having more matches means a higher success rate for loners that want a “one in a million” partner, rather than whoever is nearby. 

The compatibility quiz helps you find other introverts or extroverts who get along with shyer personalities. According to’s owners, scientific matching is a matter of:

  • Matching qualities based on shared interests
  • An algorithm that calculates your “must-haves” in matches and your online responses to these qualities
  • Studying the behavior of other reserved or withdrawn personalities

Socially awkward types can type in keyword interests or lifestyle preferences to get a specific match. Users can also try daily matches, which resembles Tinder’s more random swipe system. starts the dialog by saying User1 has favorited User2’s profile, which gets the conversation started. wins because of its enhanced search filters that help socially awkward users find common ground quickly.


  • Compatibility quiz that matches introverts with better quality singles
  • Private incognito mode to avoid conversing with someone you don’t like
  • events to meet others in a live social setting



  • A verification waiting period



  • 3 Months: $23.99/month
  • 6 Months: $20.99/month
  • Twelve-month: $19.99/month




Best for Introverted Career Professionals

Seventy percent of CEOs describe themselves as natural introverts. No wonder sites like EliteSingles states upfront that many of its users are working professionals.

EliteSingles caters to a professional demographic. Shy users receive matches based on the  5-Factor personality questionnaire, as well as a percentage of compatibility. 

The “Have You Met?” feature expands beyond personalized results in case your ideal match didn’t quite make the cut. Shy users will appreciate receiving a well-rounded view of potential matches, such as a match’s values and ambitions in life.


  • No need to scroll through lists – you receive the best quality matches directly
  • Excellent filtering system to weed out fake profiles
  • Career profiles verified by customer care



  • For established career professionals, not great for under 25



  • 3 Months: $57.95/month
  • 6 Months: $44.95/month
  • 12 Months: $31.95/month




Free Site for Shy Singles Who Don’t Want to Pay

Antisocial and shy singles may have difficulty committing to a paid service since this requires serious investment. ShyPassions provides another option. ShyPassions is a new site but part of the Passions Network, which dates back to 2004. 

The site offers a totally free online dating experience, ideal for loners and anti-social singles that want to browse but not commit beyond curiosity. The site even includes some Facebook-like quirks to break the ice and keep the attention of users.


  • Free personals, interactive message boards, and emails 
  • Avatar creation
  • Tag other users to get their attention



  • Small membership



  • Free membership!




Top Choice for Quiet Types Looking to Settle Down

The eHarmony site not only rejects fake profiles but disqualifies low-quality profiles. Shy singles can break the ice by sending autogenerated questions to their matches. The “29 dimensions of compatibility” questionnaire helps you meet more people that match your lifestyle, intellect, values, and personality type.

The popular introvert dating site is an ideal choice for quiet users that are not necessarily shy or inexperienced, but still tired of finding incompatible matches.


  • ID verification required 
  • Ideal for withdrawn users tired of dating the wrong type
  • 29 dimensions of compatibility questionnaire



  • Systems may send bad matches or very few




Top Site for Senior-Aged Introverts 

OurTime caters to the senior demographic, knowing many seniors feel shy about jumping back into the dating world. The site has a fairly good dating pool with 20 million profiles. Create a detailed profile with 16 facets of life and 7 personality-related questions. Shy and loner seniors can specify preferred first date activities for a better introduction. 

Besides handpicked matches, users may enjoy the community homepage that lends itself to small talk, with topics like new pictures, birthdays, and user status messages. Reserved seniors might appreciate niceties such as knowing who viewed or favorited their profile.


  • Advanced search features for specific hobbies, interests or even horoscopes
  • Swipe feature to search random members instead of personalized matches
  • The ConnectMe feature creates a virtual SMS without a real phone number



  • No identity verification



  • 6 months: $90 ($3.75/week)
  • 1 Month: $29.96 ($7.49/week)
  • Best Value (6 months) $107.76 ($4.49/week)




Most Awesome Shy Dating Site for Millennials 

With 30-50 million registered users, OkCupid is one of the biggest sites for socially awkward types and the most millennial-friendly. 

OkCupid stresses diversity and inclusivity, including LGBTQ-focused matching, 22 sexual orientations, and 13 genders. You can also filter out the wrong types by specifying religious views, political preferences, and social justice-type questions to avoid awkward confrontations.

The site’s random and funny personality questions start conversations easily, even if you are shy by nature. You can share prompts about the last show you watched or create “badges” for your most passionate opinions. 


  • Younger and LGBTQ-friendly demographics
  • The questionnaire offers a mix of deep questions and fun questions 
  • Only matches can message you – a relief for shy people!



  • Older demographics may feel out of place



  • 1 Month: $9.95/month
  • 3 Months: $7.95/month
  • 6 Months: $4.95/month




Number One Site for Shy African-American Matchmaking

Black People Meet is an ethnicity-focused site, catering to black men and women. However, white singles and other ethnicities looking for black dates can also create profiles. 

The site’s focus on African-American dating is a relief for shy singles who have an attraction to black or white partners but may feel awkward admitting such. Shy users will also appreciate a chance to shine away from the noise of the club scene.

Shy users get an anonymous phone number as well as the ProfilePro service, which helps create higher quality profile descriptions for a premium cost. The unique game “Who do you like?” breaks the ice and lets you compare pictures of two members and choose one.


  • Launched in 2002 and with over five million members
  • Active black membership, but open to anyone
  • Disposable/virtual phone number for security



  • No extensive matching system like competing sites



  • 1 Month: $16.75/month
  • 3 Months: $12.99/month 
  • 6 Months $10.99/month



Coffee Meets Bagel

Most Practical Site for Shy Women

Coffee Meets Bagel reduces social anxiety by letting you do less. The site is characterized by two unique features: automatic “smart” matches and friend-of-a-friend matching. With Coffee Makes Bagel, you rely on an old fashioned matchmaker that tells you who your best matches are, based on shared interests and common friends.

Introverted women get to “pre-screen” matches, making sure all matches meet their criteria and have already liked their profile before a discussion begins. Upon liking a new profile, users can send messages immediately. CMB is all about avoiding the long-waiting process, which turns some shy users off.


  • Automatic matching with little time investment required
  • Unique friend-to-friend matching system
  • Anti-ghosting features to spy on your date’s site activity



  • No searchable profiles



  • 1 Month: $34.99/month
  • 3 Months: $24.99/month
  • 6 Months: $19.99/month
  • 12 Months: $14.99/month




Top Introvert Dating App for Super-Shy Guys

Bumble caters to people shy about dating who might want to browse before they make a commitment. The free app has an option to switch from “seeking friends”, “seeking dates”, or “seeking business opportunities”, just in case you’re not ready to admit you’re looking for love.

The app’s unique approach is to let female users “make the first move”, which is great for introverted guys who feel socially awkward. How about letting the woman take the lead and replying to her opening line? Even though men love Bumble, the app is female-centered since women don’t have to talk to men that don’t interest them. 


  • Bumble users can search for friends, dates, or business associates
  • Women make the first move in responding
  • The basic service is free



  • A woman only has 24 hours to respond



  • One-week: $8.99/week
  • One-month: $24.99/month
  • Three-months: $16.66/month
  • Six-months: $13.33/month



Christian Mingle

Top Honors Site for Shy Christians 

Christians singles are often shy about dating because they take relationships and faith seriously. Christian Mingle filters out the religiously incompatible and makes sure users find someone “evenly yoked” with their values. 

Singles that have a “wrong type” can hide their profiles from potential matches and browse anonymously. On the other hand, premium members can message anyone, including free members. The site gives plenty of advice to new users, including guides on how to write a compelling first message. 


  • Religious-filtering and family-oriented matchmaking
  • Life and marital advice included
  • Strict verification system that often spots fake profiles



  • Somewhat basic features for starting conversations



  • 6 Months: $24.99/month
  • 3 Months: $34.99/month
  • 1 Month: $49.99/month




Most Fun Anonymous Chat App

Anomo makes chatting easy for shy newcomers since you can chat and make friends anonymously. There’s no need to share personal information too soon, just “unlock” it when ready.

Even better, Anomo takes a fun approach to dating anonymously, with avatars, games, and icebreaker questions. You can even “check-in” to a new location and instantly get notified if a potential match is nearby. Anomo can also be used for business or simply making friends, which removes the high-pressure dating feeling. 


  • Free games, avatars, message boards, and icebreaker messages
  • Lock personal information, then “unlock” it when ready 
  • Matches four users at once and sends icebreaker questions



  • Small user base



  • Free membership!




Best Site for Shy World-Traveling Introverts 

Zoosk has a giant pool of 45 million users across 80 countries. Shy world-travelers are in luck because you can find someone in just about every city thanks to the site’s wide reach, for presumably short-term friendships. Surfing profiles beats going to an international bar!

The Super Send feature is of special interest to socially awkward types. With Super Send, you eliminate the pressure of starting a conversation and simply forward a selected icebreaker to dozens of mutual matches. 


  • LGBTQ-friendly
  • Behavioral matchmaking engine
  • 2020 Update: New Zoosk “Lively” app lets users video chat



  • Many invasive ads



  • 1 Month: $29.95/month
  • 3 Months: $19.98/month
  • 6 Months: $12.49/month




Site with the Most Interesting Conversation

Hinge is the dating app for introverts ready to exit the single life. Fast forward to an emotional connection with the dating app’s personality-oriented algorithm. Users get to know each other by answering unique answers to prompts as well as political and religious questions.

Break the ice by commenting on a public story or photo, or by selecting a specific part of a user’s profile for a reply. All matches happen because of at least one shared interest or shared Facebook friend, which makes the initial conversation easy. 


  • Users comment on sections of your profile for an easy icebreaker
  • Service follows up on your dating experiences for improvement
  • “Date from home” webcam chat



  • Smaller user base



  • 1 Month: $9.99/Month
  • 3 Months: $6.99/month
  • 6 Months: $4.99/month


FAQs about Shy Matchmaking

“Does online dating work for shy singles?”

Online dating sites work better for reserved people because they get easier access to more possible matches. The law of averages suggests the more “no’s” you experience, the likelier you will eventually get a yes. 

Online dating is the most efficient way to quickly meet more people that doesn’t stress you out or drain your social energy.

According to Psychology Today, shy people prefer online dating because they “have difficulty forming and maintaining” close relationships. A Rice and Markey study in 2009 stated socially anxious individuals preferred communicating online rather than in person. 

“Any advice on how to date as an introvert?”

  1. Be honest, but don’t volunteer too much information too soon. 
  2. Talk about the things that you love and the hobbies/passions that make you interesting.
  3. Start the conversation with something you both have in common.
  4. As the initiator, it’s up to you to put the other person at ease. Try to make them laugh.
  5. Take a high-quality profile picture! 

For more information on how to take your absolute best profile photo, get some photo tips directly from one of our best-reviewed sites, Zoosk. 

“How can I stay safe when swiping?”

  • Google search your date or consider running a background search
  • Do not talk about where you live, or provide any financial/residential information 
  • Don’t take the early conversation off the site
  • Always talk to your date via live webcam before meeting
  • Choose a public setting for the first date
  • Always bring your cell phone and make sure it’s charged
  • Tell at least one friend or family member know where you’re going and who you’re dating 

“Bars and clubs are lame. What are some date ideas for introverts?”

  • Play a board game
  • Amusement park
  • Food/wine tasting
  • Touring a museum
  • Discuss books at a bookstore
  • Double date with friends
  • Comic store 
  • Live music


Our finds determined that offers the most advanced searching capabilities, as well as many daily matches because of the large pool of active members. Match’s overall search abilities and matchmaking process will appeal to a timid person’s desire to find common interests. Better yet, you can play the law of averages without facing too much rejection. 

EliteSingles and ShyPassions came in a close second and third, because of their opposite and intense focuses; career professionals and free dating without commitment. However, Match’s numerous success stories, many written by introverts, made all the difference. 

You may feel intimidated at the idea of signing up for an online dating site, but over time you will get used to the experience. You have total freedom and privacy to follow your heart. Take a chance, fellow introverts, and find a love connection today!

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